How A Growth Mindset Can Be A Stress Relief for Kids

We've all experienced it, a moment so stressful, our brains effectively 'shut down', allowing our emotions to forge ahead and override our creativity.

Stress relief for kids happens in a similar way. 

Ironically, the very creativity that, were it allowed to flourish, would give rise to all manner of realistic and attainable solutions to our current stressful situation. 

Of course, with the number of responsibilities we have in any given day, it's common to feel those moments where the solutions to our problems seem so far out of reach and, occasionally, also feel the associated sting to our pride as we announce with tremendous energy that ‘all hope is lost’. 

As adults, however, we have worked hard to develop a growth mindset about stressful feelings, identifying the signs and stopping the override function in its tracks while taking steps to keep unproductive emotions at bay. 

As children are learning to develop the skills of a growth mindset and experience stress, it is common for them to start announcing their intentions to solve their problems through exaggerated means. Comments such as, "Well, I'll just stop going to school forever!" or "I'm NEVER doing this again!" can echo down the hallway during particularly heated moments. 

Although these initial solutions are unrealistic, it is important at this point not to be dismissive by telling children they are being 'silly' or 'ridiculous'. We are all very possessive of our ideas - yes, even the unrealistic ones - and often view them as extensions of ourselves. 

Aiming for these personally constructed ideas could be interpreted by the child as an attack on their personality, escalating the situation while making the possibility of finding a solution even more remote. 

This initial outpouring of emotions is followed by the inevitable 'come down' moment. In these moments, feelings of embarrassment, remorse and overall exhaustion can emerge, again providing an opportunity for re-connection rather than retribution. 

The child may seek verbal or physical reassurance that they are still loved and that they have not done ever-lasting damage to your sacred relationship. 

Once calm again, your child will be grateful for your well-thought-out response. It’s at this point that you can pave the way for the neural connections necessary for a growth mindset to develop and encourage a discussion towards the all-important creative, realistic and self-owned solution.